If you have been checking out my Instagram posts for the last few days, you might have seen that I have been talking about bullying prevention and awareness week.
As the week ends, I want to share part of the reason why I feel so strongly against bullying.
Last year, my son had a tough time with a specific boy in his class. Initially, they hit it off based on their mutual love for basketball. But then something changed. He would repeatedly tell my son he didn’t like him and that he didn’t want to be his friend. The teacher said my son should give the other kid space, and frequent complaints were made against MY son.
It’s true… You shouldn’t force someone to be your friend, but it’s also not okay to say hurtful things and spread hate.
My little boy cried at home every day. He started believing that nobody wanted to play with him and that he had no friends. When I told the teacher, she insisted that it wasn’t true. But when I picked him up from school, I would see a lost little boy coming out of the building. He would be alone, looking deflated and defeated. It was heartbreaking. I wanted to hold him close, hug him tight and say you don’t ever have to go to school again. I was so angry; at the other kid, and even at the teacher. I wanted to tell my son that the world is full of assholes; I even wanted to spew other hate filled words for that child.
But, I am a parent, first and foremost. So instead, I told him not to play with kids who don’t want to play with him. He’s awesome and if they can’t see that then they aren’t worth his time. It took a lot of work for him to overcome this. I had to build up a broken child every few days and every morning remind him to be kind but yet not to play with this boy. That misled boy continued to say mean things. Finally, one day the boy came up to him and said, “I don’t want to be your friend,” and my son responded with “I don’t care”. He was proud of himself and told me about it when he got home from school.
I am thrilled at how happy he is this year. His teacher is awesome, and truly believes in him. He comes out of school running, surrounded by friends, and has a plethora of stories to tell every day. Without that boy in his life, his confidence is brimming.
He didn’t let that BULLY dim his light and though he didn’t have a team to fight bullying, he had his parents with him every step of the way. I was disappointed in the teacher because she could have been that “hero” who stood up against the bullying, but she chose to turn a blind eye.
As he gets older, I want him to be confident enough to know that he can persevere. Unfortunately, bullying follows us into the workplace and is even trickier to deal with. My kids need to be able to handle themselves, because sadly, there is no hero waiting to protect them, and I won’t always be there.
They need to be their own heroes. They need to stop the bullying around them and be kind. The world is a shitty place at times, and who knows what it will be like when they are older. The best I can do as a mom is raise decent human beings that won’t be hurtful towards others, and won’t turn a blind eye to injustice. I am sure they will make me proud.